So I promised you vlogs, bitches. And vlogs I have provided.

But first, can I just show you something? It’s something that made me so happy I almost wet myself. Almost. Al-most. It’s me . . . as a zombie. A zombie! A ZOMBIE! (kay, I might be a little slaphappy at this moment, thanks)

Here it is! AWESOME!

I think people might be this happy when their children are born. Maybe. I’m a ZOMBIE! And a COMIC ZOMBIE! I’ve linked the pic to the awesome team that zombied me up: my friend Wendell and his brother, the brainz behind Three Quarter Comics. I would be happy to eviscerate either of them with my sharp little canines, I love them so much for making me a ZOMBIE.

I actually squealed, then did a (zombie) Snoopy dance, then shouted, then giggled for four minutes, straight. Which is a really long time to giggle maniacally in front of friends without explaining yourself, believe me.

And speaking of friends, I’ve enlisted the help of my mates Ruth, Erik, and Linda to vlog another reading of Tracking the Tempest. I’m sure you’re sick of hearing my awful, awful voice and, quite frankly, it’s not the same vlogging without being able to bounce on my enormous ball.

So here are two videos, both of which are from a relatively central section of the book. There ARE some spoilers in this section, as this wasn’t the scene I’d originally intended to vlog. But it’s too perfect for three people, and I had three willing victims . . . er . . . volunteers!

Watch out for these highlights:

– Me sniggering at my own jokes! Obnoxious!

– Linda enjoying her garlic bread. It was delicious!

– Confusion over the term “ejaculation.”

– My reaching for my wine during filming. You can hear the “plonk” as I set it back down.

– My directorial debut, in which you’re reminded why I shouldn’t talk in public. Oh, that accent! Ouch!

So here’s the final reading from Tracking the Tempest, part one:

And here’s part two:

I hope you guys enjoyed the reading! And thanks so much to Rootie, Linda, and Erik for doing it for me. Linda and Ruth I know from Edinburgh, and Erik I went to high school together. Thanks soooo much for humoring me, guys. You’re the best!

In real life news, I return to Chicago tomorrow. I’ll blog my final adventures in Britain in a few days, although pictures were thin on the ground with Ruth being out of commission with her appendectomy. Yes, for those of you not following me on Facebook or Twitter, Ruth had to have an emergency appendectomy after she left Brighton. So it was all a bit crazy, but still super fun and amazing.

In other exciting news, when I get back from England, I turn around and leave for . . . Maine! I’m visiting Eastport and the Old Sow, and will blog with tons of pics from Jane’s world. So stay tuned!

Finally, please give Ruth, Linda, and Erik a round of applause. They were convinced no one would be interested, but I thought they did an absolutely stellar job of reading from Tracking. And I, for one, appreciate it greatly. Bravo, ladies and gentleman. 🙂